Do buy a card

It may look tacky but for some reason mums feel the need to make sure that any visitors know exactly how great a mother she is.

Do not buy an inappropriate card

You may think the condolence card is hilarious but she probably won’t – keep it simple, if you want to avoid a soppy poem then try looking at the humour subsection in the card shop – just make sure that somewhere on the card it says: ‘Happy Mothers’ Day’.

Do visit a florist

It’s hard to go wrong with a nice bunch of flowers especially just as spring is arriving, although this year daffodils may be a bit thin on the ground due to the extended winter.  Even if she hates them she will only have to live with them for a few days.

Do not steal flowers from a local cemetery

This is just wrong.  To avoid the wrath of an angry spirit, get to the florist early.  Top tip: If the florist is closed then there will be lots of vans selling flowers in lay-bys along motorways.  (If you do take flowers from a grave make sure to remove the condolence card.)

Do cook her dinner

It is amazing how relaxed she will be if she has an evening away from the stove (and a few glasses of wine) – this may also be the best time to ask for a loan, tell her you failed an exam or own up to that dodgy stain on the carpet!

Do not forget the washing up

All your hard work cooking will be undone if she has to spend six hours on Monday cleaning up after you in the kitchen – the loan will be renegotiated, revision timetables will be made and you will spend two hours on your hands and knees scrubbing out that stain!